I forgive you Mom for all that you did and I did that was not in harmony with love. I forgive you for leaving my dad. I forgive you for blaming my dad for your leaving when it was you that caused it. But you blamed dad. Stuck in victim mentality. And you taught this mentality to me, victim hood. I'm learning to overcome this ego trap. I forgive you for your having fallen for the same trap. I forgive you for marrying dad in the first place. I forgive you for always thinking a man is the answer for happiness. Sometimes goal completion is another form of happiness. I forgive you for the neglect I receive as an adult. I suppose I am too old to receive what I expected from a mother. I will wait for my next life for that. I forgive you for my trampling on all of your attempts to fix things in our relationship. I was angry. I forgive you for your anger in response. I forgive you for being mean. I forgive you for the physical abuse that I endured from you as a child. I forgive you for running into the arms of who you ended up with. I forgive you for not respecting boundaries. I forgive you for your lack of understanding and total judgment for what happened when I was unconscious. I forgive you for your judgment for when I experienced psychosis. I forgive you for not wanting to pay for my college education but paying for my little sister. I forgive you for buying her a car and not me. I forgive you for never welcoming me back home even when I was homeless. I forgive you for overlooking and undermining me. I forgive you for gathering up support against me and for calling me mean. Do you know what it's like to have your mother and others judge you allllll together? I forgive you for sitting with my cousins instead of me at my cousin's wedding. I forgive you for not posting a single picture even though I took at least four with your phone. I forgive you for running off to Florida with my sisters for Thanksgiving and I did not even receive a text from any of you. I forgive you for your hateful love. I forgive you for the constant abuse. I forgive you for the choice of your husband. I forgive you for just not knowing any better and for having an unhealed inner child. I forgive you for never knowing how to heal yourself. I forgive you for all the fears of hell and final judgment that you harbor. I just forgive you. Trying to keep my distance. Doesn't seem to make sense that your mom could be harmful for your mental health. Gotta keep healing. Awareness is key. It was helpful to write this.thanks for listening
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