Brite Haven

I have suffered from delusions my whole life up until 2009 when I was hospitalized.  My delusions about the Bible and society affected every aspect o my life. As I got older my delusions became stronger and stranger.  I thought that I was being stalked by the hells Angels and investigated by the police.  I was positive that I was a victim of gang stalking even though I had no affiliation with any gangs nor was I doing anything illegal. In 2009 I was so paranoid that I would never leave my room or home, I isolated myself from everyone of of fear.  I couldn't even watch tv without thinking that the tv could read my mind.  I believed that I had to read the Bible backwards to get to heaven and I thought members of my family were being cloned. I could not distinguish my really family members from the clones and it terrified me.  After a few months of this my father went to the Justice of the Peace and proved I was a danger to my self and community so police came and took me to the hospital. After a month of taking different meds my psycharist found a med which brought me down to earth.  After I came to my senses I began to feel guilty and ashamed for putting my family through that ordeal.  I was put on a community treatment order for one year, if I did not take my meds the police could pick me up from anywhere and take me to the hospital.

I am so grateful that my doctor found a med that worked or I would have been dead, in jail or institutionalize indefinitely.  After my hospitalization I felt like I had to relearn everything I had learned in life.  I feel like I had to go through all the stages of life all over again in order to grow and become whole.  I had to start all over again so I could rebuild.